Monthly Archives: June 2009

Pardonnez-moi, monsieur.

I’m just sitting here in the office trying to mind my own business, and this creepy old dude keeps staring at me:

pierre the lech

Sir, though you may like what you see, please do avert your eyes and get to conducting something by someone named Igor or Johannes, if you would.

In other news, I’m happy to report that a certain JvR was pleased with my not-so-recent efforts which have just been released on disc.  Do you think that means I should take back some of the mean things I said about him?  Well, maybe not… but I guess I didn’t have to call him John Boy.

But while we’re on the subject of the American Chorale Premieres CD, might I suggest that you buy it?  Or at least download one track in particular?

Sign me up for the history books, boys.

So, word on the street is that Paul Hindemith marked the fourth movement of his Solo Viola Sonata (Op. 25 No. 4) to be played Quarter Note = 600-640.  Never one to back down from a challenge, I’d like to use this space to present my own new Solo Viola Sonata:

Picture 3

I would ask that performers pay particular attention to the staccati.

Upon further thought, I have decided to authorize this piece for performance on the 35,000-year-old Vulture Bone Flute.  From henceforth, it shall be known as the White Solo Sonata for Viola or 35,000-year-old Vulture Bone Flute.

Seeing as there is no other music or music-industry related news that I could possibly comment on, I bid thee adieu.


squirrel w walnut

Editor’s note from the first edition (State Music Publishing House, Moscow, 1938) of Prokofiev’s 2nd Suite from Romeo and Juliette:

The “maracas” (6th movement), originally from Cuba, consist of two walnuts hollowed and dried, and then packed with grains.  This instrument is used for playing rhumba (jazz).  A box filled with many nails can be substituted for the maracas.

An open response to the Editor:

No, it certainly can’t.  Might I recommend that the next time you are dancing the rhumba or any other (jazz) number, you kindly take the aforementioned box of nails and beat it against your skull?  Oh, and would you please send me some Gargantuan Russian Walnuts while you’re at it?  I’m feeling a bit peckish.

Is this your tempoo?  Tooo Slooow…